Friday, January 24, 2014
My baby boy is five today. It physically hurts to think about how quickly those years have passed. And they haven’t been easy . . . but they have been pretty awesome. For me, motherhood has been a bit of an emotional roller coaster, and birthdays just happen to be one of those bittersweet reminders that time moves on before you’re ready for it to move you. Five years ago, I would never have imagined I’d feel this way but . . . I miss being woken up at night to feed a baby. I miss having a baby hanging off my hip. I miss the good stuff, but I also miss the hard stuff.
Every morning, at about 4:00 sharp, I’m woken up by a little voice that says, “Mommy, can I snuggle with you?” The answer will always be yes. Because the day is coming when there will be a last time. His older brothers are past that. I find myself carrying him through the parking lot on the way into the store. Not because I have to, because I like to. Yes, to a bystander, I probably look ridiculous carrying this now five year old, almost 40 pound child. But there will be a day soon when I can no longer pick him up. And since I’m the kind of girl who squeezes every last drop out of something sweet, I’ll take my chances while I still have them. Happy Birthday, Sawyer. You’ll always be your mommy’s baby.
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